Always learning

I have to say that I tend to be an initial worrier. What I mean by this is that when I start learning or being informed of something new I panic and think worst case senerio. I really wish I didn't do this but I do. I haven't written in a while and have had been tinking a lot about what it means to have our daughter (and soon to be son) who are (will be) transracially adopted. We had classes on raising internationally adopted children required by our agency when we adopted our daughter. (which were great and I believe should be requiremnts). I learned a lot during these classes and was challenged by them as well. I don't know if I really digested all that was presented to me (especially with our triad panel). For those of you who don't know what this means it is: adoptees, birthparents, and adoptive parents. Now that I have our daughter and she is getting older (yes I know she is only two) I am really trying to educate myself more so I can hopefully give her what she needs being a transracial adoptee. I'm new at blogging and have encountered some blogs of adult adoptees. I have to say first reading some of these I felt (as I stated above) paniced along with fearful, unprepared, unexperienced, and nieve to some of the things that transratial adoptees have and do go through. I was not totally unaware of this but I have a better (still I'm sure very limited understanding) of what some of these individuals have and will go through. BUT after thinking more and reading more (from all different perspectives) Iam glad to have this information and will use it to help my children in the best way I can. As a mother I want to protect my children from all harsh realities in life but I know I can't or even should. So I am more commited then ever to help raise my children to be who they are and hopefully be proud of who they are. I know this can not be done all on my own and will need resources or influences from others (especially other transracial adoptees who will know what my children are going through more then I ever could). So I can either live in fear for myself and my children or be proactive. I choose to be proactive because I love my children and chose them. I'm also thanful for the sights I have read on ethical adoptions and wish we had to take a class on this when we adopted our daughter. I pray God gives me the strength and knowledge to do what is right and support those who are and trying to make a positive and just difference for orphaned and adopted children. I have found quite a few books on the subject and can't wait to read them all. I will post them as I read them.